I wasn’t supposed to be here. Johnny had warned me away, telling me that the compound was no place for a girl like me. I nearly snapped his head off and reminded him I was a grown-ass woman and not some child. He was all of two minutes older than me, but acted like he was thirty and not nineteen. My twin brother was a pain in the damn ass, but I missed him. We’d done everything together, until he’d decided to prospect for the Dixie Reapers, then overnight, he was gone. All his time was tied up with club business, and he no longer came home to visit. He’d walked away from me, and it hurt like hell, especially since he damn well knew what life was like at home.
I didn’t have a car, and walking all the way to the compound hadn’t been fun, but as I approached the gates, I felt my stomach twist and turn. I’d met a few of the prospects from the times I’d shown up to see Johnny, but I’d never met the patched members, and Johnny wanted to keep it that way. He’d told me that what went on in the clubhouse wasn’t something I ever wanted to be a part of, and I’d avoided the place all this time, but as I heard the music blasting from inside I wondered if the temptation would be too great.
The hem of my denim skirt rode up, and I tugged it back down as I neared the gate. The prospect on the other side was one I’d met once or twice. He always leered at me and gave me the creeps, but so far he’d kept his hands to himself. His gaze caressed me in a way that suggested he’d like to do far more than look, and I tried to hold back my shiver of revulsion at the mere thought of his hands on me. It wasn’t that he was bad looking, but he definitely gave off a creeper vibe.
“You here to see Johnny?” he asked.
“Yeah. Thought I’d surprise him.”
“Oh, he’ll be surprised all right. He’s inside,” the prospect said, tipping his head toward the clubhouse. “But then, you aren’t allowed in there are you? Too pristine for a place like that.”
“I’m not pristine,” I snapped.
I might be a virgin in the strictest sense, but I was far from angelic. I’d never technically had sex, even though I’d given a few blow jobs and fooled around, but I’d used my trusty vibrator to take care of my virginity. I’d heard it would hurt, and no way was I trusting a guy with something like that. Especially not since the guys I knew were selfish and fumbling. No finesse whatsoever.
“Just remember that you were warned.” The gate slid open, and he motioned toward the clubhouse. “Enter at your own risk.”
That sounded like something the creepy guy in horror movies says right before the heroine does something incredibly stupid, like enter a house full of mass murderers, or choose the darkened pathway filled with deformed, dying trees instead of the brightly lit path. This was just a clubhouse full of bikers, one of whom was my brother. How bad could it be?
I stepped through the gate and made my way across the lot to the building with Dixie Reapers across the top in neon, and slowly climbed the steps. The noise from inside was even louder now, and I pushed open the doors, not sure what to expect. The way my brother talked, I half-expected naked women and orgies going on out in the open. My gaze scanned the room, but I didn’t see my brother -- or any orgies. The place was packed wall-to-wall with men and women in leather cuts with Dixie Reapers stitched across the back. Other than some smoking and drinking, I didn’t see anything wild going on. Not that those things were wild, but to hear Johnny tell it, all kinds of shit went down in here. They just looked like your average group of adults having a nice time.
No one paid me any attention as I moved farther into the room, but the fact I was the only one not sporting one of those leather cuts made me feel a little out of place. At least I’d worn my black top and not the red one I’d picked up first. Still, I didn’t exactly blend, even if some of the women present looked to be my age or close to it. I’d learned enough from Johnny to guess those were the old ladies. He seemed rather fond of the President’s woman, and I wondered if I’d ever get a chance to meet her. To hear Johnny tell it, the woman was up for sainthood. I didn’t think anyone could ever be that perfect.
At the end of the bar, a man sat alone, a line of shot glasses in front of him, and an old worn Bible nearby. I hadn’t taken the club for being religious, but then this man didn’t seem quite like the others. He wore the same cut as everyone else, but as I studied him, I realized he was more somber. There was almost a haunted look to him, as if he were trying to drown his demons in whiskey, or whatever he was drinking. I felt this pull, as if I were supposed to get closer to him.
Slowly, I made my way across the room and slid onto the stool next to his. He didn’t even so much as glance my way, but I could tell from the way his mouth tensed that he was more than aware of my presence, and didn’t seem to care for it. I didn’t know what he was trying to run from, and it was honestly none of my business, but I’d found that sometimes people just needed to be reminded they weren’t as alone as they thought. Despite the fact the room was full of people, not a single one had come to sit by him. Maybe he’d chased them off, or maybe they left him alone because of the vibe he was putting out. Neither was going to deter me. Someone as sexy as he shouldn’t be drowning their sorrows. Not alone anyway.
The guy behind the bar came over, a swagger to his step and a cocky smile on his face. His cut said Prospect, but thankfully he wasn’t someone I knew. The minute my brother found out I was here, he’d likely escort me back to the gate and send me home, which was the last place I wanted to be. The guy leaned on the bar, his arms folded so that his biceps bulged. I assumed I was supposed to be impressed, but he looked just like every other asshole in my neighborhood who wanted in my pants. Not happening, buddy.
“What can I get for you, beautiful?” he asked, his lips tipping up on one side in a way I supposed most would find sexy. It wasn’t making me drop my panties, that was for sure. I was completely immune to guys like this one.
“Rum and Coke,” I said.
The guy next to me snorted.
“What?” I asked, turning my attention his way.
When his gaze clashed with mine, the breath in my lungs froze. Dark hair and a close-cropped beard were sexy enough, but damn… The man’s eyes were truly things of beauty. I saw blues, greens, golds. Maybe even a hint of gray. Those were the kind of eyes a woman could get lost in, the kind of eyes that would make her do something really stupid.
“You ever actually had a rum and Coke?” he asked, his voice deep and smooth.
He smiled a little. Not a full-out smile, and not even a smirk. It was almost like his lips had turned up without his permission because it was gone almost as fast as it happened.
“Why don’t you give her a Sex On The Beach?” the guy next to me said.
The Prospect leered at me. “Oh, I’d be delighted.”
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. “Just the drink, thanks.”
I could tell he wanted to say something, but he refrained, walking off to fix my drink. I focused on the guy sitting next to me again, and noticed his cut said Preacher. Since he had a Bible nearby, I wondered if that’s how he’d gotten the name. I didn’t think an actual preacher would be sitting here drinking alcohol. But then, I didn’t really know any religious types.
“I’m Kayla,” I said.
He went back to looking at his shot glasses, which were empty now. Now that he’d spoken to me, no way was I letting him go back to his brooding silence. He was probably older than I’d first thought, but that only made me curious. I was used to guys my age, who didn’t know what the hell they were doing. But a guy like him? I was willing to bet that he knew exactly how to treat a woman, both in and out of the bedroom.
“Why aren’t you partying with everyone else?” I asked.
“Weddings aren’t really something I like to celebrate,” he said.
“Don’t believe in marriage?”
He held up his left hand, a gold band on his ring finger. “Already met my one and only. And someday I’ll get to see her again.”
See her again?
“Did she move?” I asked.
“Yeah.” He glanced my way. “To heaven.”
Way to put your foot in your mouth, Kayla.
“I’m sorry. I wouldn’t have pushed if I had known. It must be hard being here without her.”
He shrugged. “It’s been twelve years, but it doesn’t get any easier.”
Holy hell! She’d died twelve years ago, and he still wore his wedding ring? Talk about commitment! I couldn’t even get a guy to go past the first date, and here he was, a widower for over a decade, and he still carried his wife in his heart. Part of me wanted to cry over the pain he must feel from losing his wife, but the other part thought it was touching that love like that still existed outside books and movies.
“She must have been really amazing,” I said.
“She was.” I got a genuine smile that time.
The Prospect returned with my drink, and another line of shots for Preacher. We talked and drank for over an hour until both of us were well on our way to being drunk. If anyone asked later, I’d say that’s how I ended up in their meeting room, or whatever the hell they called it, with my skirt shoved up and my panties ripped off me. Yeah, definitely the alcohol, and didn’t have a damn thing to do with raging hormones and a hot as hell biker who needed a little comforting.
Johnny was going to kill me when he found out.
* * *
The gorgeous woman who had listened to me talk about my wife, and had seemed genuinely interested, was exactly what I’d needed. I didn’t know precisely when she’d ended up in my lap, or at what point I’d started kissing her, but it wasn’t long before we were stumbling down the hallway. I pushed her into the room we used for Church. If Torch knew, he’d kick my ass, but I never took women to my home. It made them think it was something more than it was.
I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been this damn turned-on, though. It should have scared me, the feelings tumbling around inside me, but I shoved them down and just focused on the pleasure. Her curvy body pressed tight to mine, and damn if it didn’t feel like her hands were branding me everywhere they touched. She fumbled with my belt, and a moment later she had my pants unzipped and her hand was diving into my underwear and wrapping around my cock.
I pulled her top off and dropped it onto the table, then leaned back a little to admire the view. The scrap of black lace that cupped her breasts was probably the sexiest thing I’d ever seen. Pulling up her skirt, I saw the panties matched, and I had this insane urge to keep them as a souvenir. Kayla’s hands were tugging my pants and boxer briefs down until my cock was freed.
She dropped to her knees and licked her lips, her gaze fastening on mine, as she leaned forward and gave my cock a long, slow lick. I groaned and sank my fingers into her hair, urging her to do it again. Fuck but that felt incredible! It had been a while since I’d been with anyone, but I knew it hadn’t felt like this.
“Open, baby. Wrap those lips around my cock,” I told her.
Her lips parted, and I thrust inside. Her mouth felt like heaven as I stroked a little deeper each time. She looked hot as fuck on her knees, my cock in her mouth. Those sultry eyes of hers were nearly my undoing as she stared up at me.
“You can take more, can’t you, sweetheart?” I asked.
She hummed, which I took as an agreement. Kayla deep-throated me, taking every fucking inch of my cock, not gagging so much as once. It was like she was made for this, made to be fucked. I gripped her hair tighter and fucked her mouth, not stopping until I came. She swallowed, and then kept sucking even after I didn’t have anything left to give. I was still hard as granite, which hadn’t happened since… No, I wasn’t going to think of her while I was fucking Kayla. It wasn’t fair to either of them. With any other woman, I wouldn’t have cared, but Kayla… She didn’t seem like the others I’d fucked for a quick release. She listened, and she seemed to understand my pain. This wasn’t a quick screw to let off steam. It was something more, which was downright terrifying.
I pulled free of her mouth and helped her to her feet. I normally fucked the women from behind, so I didn’t have to look at them, but I wanted to see her wide, expressive eyes as I pounded into her sweet pussy. Tearing her panties from her body, I urged her onto the table and spread her legs wide. My cock slid along her slit, and it felt so damn good. I closed my eyes a moment, just savoring the feel of her against me. Then my senses returned long enough to put on a condom. I hadn’t fucked without one since my wife died, and I wasn’t going to start now, no matter how tempting Kayla might be.
I slowly pressed inside her, gritting my teeth at how fucking tight she was. I’d never known a virgin who could suck cock like she could, but the way she gripped me had me wondering if I was her first. I nearly stopped, but she felt too damn good. She moaned and leaned back on the table, popping the front clasp on her bra and cupping her breasts. Christ! I sank balls-deep into her, only pausing a moment. The fact she wasn’t in any pain, and I hadn’t felt anything tear inside her, gave me a sense of relief that I wasn’t going to fuck up her first time.
She lifted her hips a little, letting me slide in even deeper, and my control snapped. I gripped her hips tight as I plunged into her again and again, fucking her with a passion that had long been absent from my life. Her sweet cries just added fuel to the flames, and I wouldn’t have been able to stop if I tried. I wanted her, needed her. I’d not allowed myself to feel a connection to anyone in so fucking long, but with her, even if it was just a few minutes, I completely lost myself in the moment. I didn’t shut down my emotions. It wasn’t mindless fucking, but something more.
“Rub your clit, baby. Let me feel you come on my cock,” I murmured.
Her small fingers circled the little bud, and I felt her pussy clench down. It wasn’t long before she was coming, crying out my name as her body tensed and her pussy tried to milk me dry. I fucked her until every drop of cum had been pulled from my balls, and even then I wasn’t ready to pull out. She clasped me tightly as she panted for breath, her eyes still glazed and hazy from her release.
“That was so worth the wait,” she said softly.
I didn’t know what the hell she meant, and my brain was too sloshed with alcohol to puzzle it out. I knew I hadn’t met her before, so how could she have been waiting for this? For me? I pulled free of her body and helped her stand. Her lips pressed against mine in the gentlest of kisses, then she fixed her skirt, refastened her bra, and pulled on her shirt. With a sassy smile, she kissed me once more, longer and deeper than before, and then she walked out the door. I waited a few minutes, trying to gather my thoughts. A good ten minutes passed before my mind began to clear, and I decided to clean myself up. Whatever had just happened, I knew that it was different from anything I’d experienced in the last twelve years. I’d already met my one and only, but Kayla had touched a part of me I’d thought long dead. If I’d known she was going to disappear, I might have moved faster. Especially when I realized the fucking condom broke.
Fuck my life.
I disposed of the rubber, zipped up my pants, and started for the door, pausing when I saw a scrap of black lace on the floor. I picked it up, inhaled her sweet scent, then stuffed the ripped panties into my pocket. I hadn’t wanted to keep a woman’s panties since the night I’d first slept with my wife. I’d analyze later why I wanted to keep the damn thing, then I went back to the main room looking for Kayla. The little minx was nowhere to be found. I didn’t know who she’d come with, or why she’d been here at all, but I wasn’t ready for her to go. There wasn’t room in my life for a steady woman, and there never would be, but it didn’t mean we couldn’t enjoy each other’s company a little more.
I stepped out onto the porch and scanned the area. No sight of her. The Prospect at the gate was smoking a cigarette as I approached, and he straightened when he saw me. I didn’t care much for the little shit, but one of the members thought he had potential. I personally didn’t think he was going to patch in. There was just something about him that had always set me on edge.
“What can I do for you, Preacher?” he asked.
“Did you see a woman come out of the clubhouse? Maybe five or ten minutes ago?”
“Yeah, she took off. Why? Did she do something wrong? Want me to go after her?”
The light in his eyes told me that he had other reasons for wanting to go after Kayla, and I wasn’t sure I liked it. She wasn’t mine, would never be mine, but she sure as fuck didn’t belong to some punk ass Prospect either. I’d had my doubts about this one, and I’d told Torch and Venom as much. Carter. That was the little shit’s name. I’d seen the way he treated the women when he thought no one was looking, and that wasn’t going to fly as long as I was around. It was one thing to use the sluts to let off a little steam, but it was another to treat them like trash.
“She didn’t do anything wrong. I just wanted to spend some time with her.”
He grinned. “Yeah, she’s a hot little thing. I’d love to get those legs of hers wrapped around me.”
I grunted and walked off so I didn’t give in to the urge to hit the little bastard. I had no business feeling that way about a woman I’d just met, one who meant nothing to me. But there was that little voice at the back of my head, the one I didn’t like most days. But she’s different.
Yeah, she was different. And different was very, very bad.
I’d ask around and see who knew her. Maybe she was a friend of Isabella’s or Ridley’s. If I had to guess, they were close to the same age, which made her too damn young for me. Then again, my Pres was in his fifties, and he’d claimed Isabella. Fuck, he’d damn well married her, and seemed more than happy. Maybe age really was just a number in the grand scheme of things.
When I went back into the clubhouse, I scanned the crowd and quickly found Ridley and Venom. They seemed surprised when I approached them, and I wondered if I’d been too much of a reclusive bastard lately.
“Preacher,” Venom said, slapping me on the back. “Enjoying the party? The ceremony was perfect. You haven’t lost your touch.”
I grunted, not giving a shit about the wedding. Yeah, I was still technically an ordained minister, but I’d given up on God a long-ass time ago. The day he’d let my wife die, I’d turned my back and walked away. I didn’t even touch my fucking Bible anymore, unless the club needed something. Like this wedding tonight.
“Do either of you know a Kayla?” I asked.
Ridley’s brow furrowed, and she shook her head. “No. Should I?”
“I thought maybe she was a friend of yours. Are Torch and Isabella still here, or did they already take off to celebrate on their own?” I asked.
“With the looks he’s giving her, they won’t be around much longer,” Venom said. “But Isabella is across the room.”
I glanced that way and saw the blushing bride. “Thanks.”
By the time I pushed through the crowd and reached Isabella, Torch looked about two seconds away from tossing her over his shoulder and walking the fuck out. She smiled when she saw me, and the next thing I knew, she’d thrown her arms around me and was hugging the shit out of me.
“Thank you so much,” she said. “It was the best wedding ever!”
“You’re welcome. I actually came over for a reason. Do you know anyone named Kayla?” I asked.
“The name sounds familiar, but I can’t place her,” Isabella said. “Did she do something wrong?”
Why the fuck did everyone assume Kayla did something bad? She was too fucking sweet to get into trouble, unless that trouble included a drunk widower and a broken condom. I needed to find her and make sure she was okay.
“I met her here tonight, and I was just trying to figure out who she knows.”
Torch turned his piercing gaze my way. “Some woman you don’t know was here?”
“I know her now,” I muttered.
“Who’s manning the gate?” Torch asked. “This event was family only.”
“Carter,” I said, trying not to sneer as I said his name.
Torch grunted. “I’ll have a word with him tomorrow. For now, I think it’s time I get my beautiful bride out of here.”
“Congratulations, both of you,” I said, then blended back into the crowd.
I still had no idea who Kayla was, or how to find her. My gut churned as I thought about never seeing her again, but I’d fucked up. If I’d stopped her from walking away instead of standing there like an idiot, then I’d know more about her.
She probably thought I was just another asshole, using her for her body.
I had this horrible feeling that I was never going to see Kayla again, and for some reason, that really bothered me. Fuck it. She was gone, and there wasn’t shit I could do about it right now. I’d have a few more drinks, then call it a night. I could battle my conscience tomorrow.